unconventional

Today, I’m going to be getting out and about for the first time since surgery. I was a bit unrealistic about the healing time involved. Fortunately, my husband wasn’t & he was completely prepared to take care of my every need.

The greatest thing about surgery is that it took me about four hours to realize that I am 100% pain free in my neck. After all these years of living with the nasty pain, I can hardly contain my excitement from no neck pain. I had NO idea it would relieve it that quickly & that completely!

The not so great part is the soreness and discomfort. It’s really improved everyday, so I hope that by the weekend I’ll be ready to hang out with my family at my brother’s marriage celebration!

The ugly part, by far though, is that I can’t hug. I didn’t realize how much I hugged…or how much I loved it…until now. Miller & Andre are being the sweetest boys…always gentle and calm. They have given me thousands of kisses and squeezed my hand or patted my leg. They haven’t complained a bit! And how I miss my husband! He’s been with me almost constantly, but not hugging him is just terrible! We’ve been sitting next to each other on the couch…touching legs & holding hands. But no cuddling =(!!

Worst, however, I must say, is that my heart is broken over not having Keenan with me. He is in Tennessee all week with Mom because I can’t lift him…or do anything else he needs from me. And I miss him so badly I ache! I cried myself to sleep on Saturday & Sunday. It’s so weird to me how most everyday I’m alone with him, I get overwhelmed and so wish for some help. But the second he is gone, I am sad enough to cry! I will get to see him Thursday…and I’m going to really rest up so I’ll be ready to give him a big hug!!